Mark Twain

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.

Greg Garcia

That's the funny thing about havin' a kid. They come with their own set of problems; make everything else you were worried about seem kinda silly.

R. Stevens

Destiny is for people who are too lazy to create alternate timelines.

Robert Byrne

In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat.

Hermann Goering

Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. This is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and for exposing the country to danger. It works the same in every country.

Lord Falkland

When it is not necessary to make a decision, it is necessary not to make a decision.

Calvin Coolidge

Never go out to meet trouble. If you will just sit still, nine cases out of ten someone will intercept it before it reaches you.

Randy K. Milholland

Friendship is being there when someone's feeling low and not being afraid to kick them.

Louis C.K.

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Leave the dude alone and he’ll figure it out.  What are you bothering people for?

Theodosius Dobzhansky

Nothing in biology makes sense except in the light of evolution.

John Wooden

Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.

John Wooden

If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?

Don Draper

I hate to break it to you, but there is no big lie. There is no system. The universe is indifferent.

Mark Twain

There are several good protections against temptations, but the surest is cowardice.

James Carville

The best time to plant an oak tree was twenty-five years ago. The second best time is today.

Ashley Montague

Science has proof without any certainty. Creationists have certainty without any proof.

Will Rogers

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

Paul Valery

Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them.

Lord Salisbury

If you believe the doctors, nothing is wholesome; if you believe the theologians, nothing is innocent; if you believe the military, nothing is safe.

Leonard Louis Levinson

History is the short trudge from Adam to atom.

James Thurber

Human Dignity has gleamed only now and then and here and there, in lonely splendor, throughout the ages, a hope of the better men, never an achievement of the majority.